Fate: Chapter 6

"The loss which is unknown is no loss at all."

- Publilius Syrus

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.

An: Buff82, what can I say? There are no words for your amazing ability to put up with me and keep me in check.

Chapter 6: Visions of the Future

My brow puckered in confusion, my eyes trained on the area of trees that Quil had just disappeared into. I managed to catch a small glimpse of fur and scraps of clothing floating towards the ground before he was out of my sight completely.

My mind was a flurry of thought, what the hell just happened?

I was pretty sure I hadn't done anything wrong. Quil was standing there when I pulled up, smiling brightly. And although I could tell something was on his mind in the way his eyes crinkled on the sides with his obvious tension, he didn't seem initially upset.

Movement in my arms reminded me that I was still holding little Claire snuggly against my side. She was watching the party goers on the beach with rapt attention, and I shook my head to rid myself of the confused thoughts that still plagued my mind.

"Let's go find your Aunt Emily," I cooed at her, tickling her side a bit so she giggled happily.

As I scanned the crowded beach any signs of either Emily or Sam, I thought back to my day spent with Claire. I had never been around small children growing up, but somehow the maternal instincts I never knew I had kicked in and let me easily transition into the task of caring for her.

I ended up making her a classic lunch of macaroni and cheese, which she informed me was her favorite. We sat across from one another at Charlie's mismatched kitchen table as she prattled on about her Mom and Dad and everything else that seemed to come to mind. Conversation with Claire was enlightening, like getting a glimpse at the world through her unique view. It was also pleasant listening to her innocent laughter, a sound so pure it reminded me of a time when vampires and werewolves didn't exist.

After lunch she asked to play a long game of hide and go seek where I had to pretend I didn't hear her muffled giggles each and every time. Eventually I distracted her by asking for her help in preparing the pies I had offered to bring to the party.

Even after being with Quil for as long as I had been, the thought of having children of my own had never really occurred to me. It was an idea I'd given up long ago, back when I thought Edward and I would be together forever.

But in the presence of the sweetest little girl I'd ever met, I was suddenly wondering what it would be like to be a mother and have a daughter of my own. I found myself 'oohing' and 'ahhing' over every cute thing she did.

I couldn't help the smile pulling at my lips as images of a small child formed in my mind— russet skin, only a lighter, rosier shade of brown. Thick, dark hair like Quil's, warm chocolate eyes, and round soft cheeks; the two of us in one being, the idea made me happy, content even.

The thoughts had come out of nowhere, and I was shocked that I found them welcome. My body tingled and buzzed with the new feeling as I idly wondered what Quil thought about having kids, and even more so—having kids with me.

A tug from around my neck broke me from my train of thought, and I realized that Claire was pulling on the wolf charm that I had yet to take off since Quil had given it to me. "Pretty," she mused, fingering the delicate wooden carving.

"Who have you got there?" Jake's voice sounded from behind me.

I squeaked at his proximity, not having realized he was standing next to me.

I turned, and Claire tucked her face into my neck, attempting to hide from him in a sudden case of shyness. Not discouraged, Jake just continued to smile at her sweetly, though his eyes seemed guarded when he glanced in my direction. "This is Emily's niece," I supplied.

"Ah, you must be Claire," he winked and gave her a knowing grin. She nodded, her head still buried against me.

"Speaking of which, do you know where Emily is?" I asked, still unable to find her among the crowd.

"Over by the food tables," he indicated to a row of tables on the opposite side of where we stood.

"Thanks Jake." I spotted Emily standing next to what looked to be the dessert section of the exceptionally large number of tables and made my way towards her.

"Aunt Emily!" Claire squealed as we drew closer, squirming her way out of my arms before I set her down so she could run the rest of the way over.

Emily scooped her up, the unmarked side of her face twisting into a smile. "Claire Bear, Did you have fun?"

"We had my favorite for lunch," she boasted.

"Ooh… that sounds yummy."

"Can I go to Bella's again tomorrow?" Claire asked sweetly, and my heart melted a little at the request.

"Why don't I talk to Bella about that, and you can go see Uncle Sam over there and get some marshmallows for the fire." Emily set her down, and she immediately went running towards Sam.

We both watched her go before redirecting our attention to one another. "Have you seen Quil yet?" she asked before I had a chance to speak.

I frowned at the memory of his strange departure. "What's wrong?" she inquired, most likely having noticed the expression on my face.

"I saw him for a few minutes, but he took off into the woods before I got a chance to speak to him. It was weird," I explained to her the best I could the brief encounter from when I had first arrived.

Emily glanced over at Sam, and I saw the concerned look that passed between them. It made my skin crawl with anxiety, making me want to know what I was missing out on. "I'm sure everything's fine," she tried to reassure me, but I could see that the smile she gave was forced and uncertain.

"You might want to eat before the guys get over here," she joked, easing the tension that had settled over us.

"Sure, sure," I agreed. We each filled a plate, and I followed Emily over to one of the many logs set up around the fire pit. Sam and Claire were already seated, happily roasting marshmallows together.

"I hope you don't mind, but I had Quil run a quick patrol. You can never be too careful," Sam said to me as soon as I was settled in with my plate on my lap.

"No problem, I'm sure he'll be back soon." I didn't even believe my own words; there was something in the look that Quil gave me right before he ran that told me I wouldn't be seeing much him that evening. The thought saddened me.

Warmth radiated from my right as Jacob sat down beside me. I watched as he exchanged a quick look with Sam who stood. "If you'll excuse me, I'll be back shortly." He leaned down to kiss Emily and then turned and ran in the same direction Quil had gone earlier.

I wanted to ask what was going on, I wanted to know the truth, but a nagging feeling in the pit up my stomach made me keep my mouth shut. The same feeling that told my brain it was something bad and that I wasn't going to like it when I found out.

Resigning to my baser instincts I pushed my worry away. I decided distraction is what I needed and opted to ask Jake about his plans now that he'd graduated.

"Well, I'm sure you already know Quil, Embry, and I plan to open a shop together right here in La Push," he started out excitedly, his passion for fixing cars clearly evident. "Embry and I are gonna do the repairs, and Quil's gonna learn everything for taking care of the finances and stuff."

Quil had told me months ago about their plans, and I was very happy for the three of them. I didn't know whether or not Embry truly enjoyed mechanics, but I assumed he must since he was going into the business as well.

"Does it bother you that you'll be stuck in La Push," I asked before thinking. Jacob stopped speaking and looked at me funny before shaking his head.

"Bells," his voice took on a tender quality, "this is my home. I don't look at it that way."

I nodded my head in agreement without really feeling certain that I did, indeed, understand. I tried to put myself in their shoes, to think of how I would feel, growing up in the same small town and never venturing outside of its protective walls.

I think that I might have felt suffocated, and perhaps Quil was feeling just that.

Tilting my head to one side in curiosity I asked the next logical question that came to mind, "You never want to travel anywhere?"

Jake chuckled and leaned in conspiratorially, "You'd be surprised how far we can run, Bells." At his words my eyes grew wide before I could mask my expression.

Was that what Quil was doing? Thoughts raced wildly through my head, was he running away? I couldn't bring myself to ask any more questions, deep down I felt like I already knew.

Jake seemed to sense I was done with the conversation and left me be. The party continued on around me, without me really participating in it. My Dad and Billy sat nearby and attempted conversation, but after many one word answers they gave up.

I saw the looks they kept giving me and tried my best to ignore them. Thankfully it wasn't long before they left and my Dad drove Billy back home. The crowd slowly dwindled down as I continued to wait in vain for the one person I wanted to see the most.

It wasn't long before I found myself at our spot on the beach, just a ways down from everyone else. A chilled air caressed my arms, and I couldn't even shiver, I felt oddly numb. The sun sank low in the sky and people were grouping off, cuddling close on the logs and settling in for campfire stories.

I looked away, unable to witness their happiness when I felt so strangely alone. "Come on Bells, I'll drive you home." Jake appeared beside me, concern evident in his features. I didn't even have it in me to argue with him that I was more than capable of driving myself.

The ride home was silent, but not uncomfortably so. My mind was still processing the drastic change in events; the day had begun so full of promise and excitement, only to wither away in loneliness. The glint of something that flashed behind Quil's eyes before he disappeared haunted me, as it replayed in my head over and over.

Jacob walked me to my door, still silent. I could feel the sympathy rolling off of him despite the pretense that everything was okay. He gave me a weak attempt at the smile that I had always referred to as my smile. I stared passively not caring enough to make an effort, an effect of the numbness no doubt.

"Thanks Jake," I said and went inside before catching one last glimpse of his eyes. They said what he could not.

He would be there for me, with whatever happened.

I had no sooner stepped through the door when my phone rang. Not in the mood for conversation, I ignored it. When he rang again immediately afterwards I pulled it out to check the caller ID.

"Alice?"

"Bella, are you okay?" the bell like voice sounded through the receiver, slightly panicked.

Confusion over took me for the second time that night. "I'm fine. What's wrong Alice?"

"I had a vision."

I rolled my eyes. "Ok… you have those all the time, what does that have to do with me? You know you can't see my future anymore."

There was a pause before Alice spoke again. "No Bella, that's just it, the vision was about you."

***

I sat at the kitchen, much like I had with Claire earlier that day, staring at the yellowing walls that tinged an even yellower hue under the lights hanging from the ceiling.

I hadn't moved in what felt like hours. Alice had long since hung up.

What could her vision have meant? The pure fact that she had a vision at all had me completely thrown. More and more questions formed, and I had no answers. Neither did Alice unfortunately, she was as clueless as I was. To call her vision abstract or certainly subjective would be an understatement.

My legs carried me up the stairs to my room on their own accord; my body had decided sleep might help my addled brain. As soon as I walked into my room I froze, eyeing the figure lying across my bed.

"Quil."